Let us guide you through the dark reality
Tana Mongeau and Jake Paul. Photo: Denise Truscello/WireImage When famed YouTubers Jake Paul, 22, and Tana Mongeau, 21, first started “dating,” their relationship seemed rather suspicious, as in most likely founded on the desire to remain relevant — not on all-consuming love. And yet, here we are, just over three months later, and the early 20-somethings are already “married.
Exhibit B: Mongeau and Paul’s “relationship” got off to an incredibly bizarre start. If Paul was being truthful in the raunchy poem he wrote to announce the date of his nuptials, the day he met Mongeau, she — and I’m so sorry for what I’m about to divulge — “ate [his] banana.” Presumably, this unfortunate incident must’ve happened sometime before or on April 24, when the couple was first photographed together.
Exhibit D: They got married in a ceremony that looked unbearably raucous, which fans could pay to stream. Just one month post-engagement, at the Graffiti Mansion in Las Vegas, the two declared each other man and wife in a ceremony that lasted a whole ten minutes. Between Paul destroying his wedding cake with a sword, to a physical altercation that was allegedly staged, to the Oprah impersonator the couple hired, the whole night looked like a fucking mess.
Exhibit F: Mongeau skipped their European honeymoon due to a “family emergency.” Not to cast doubt on something that could potentially be serious, but, uhhh. Also, “Page Six” reports that Paul opted to board their flight to Europe instead of staying behind with his new “wife,” which again, ???????
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