British Man Astounded To Hear How Much It Would Cost To Get Mustard Jar Removed From Rectum Under U.S. Healthcare System

Singapore News News

British Man Astounded To Hear How Much It Would Cost To Get Mustard Jar Removed From Rectum Under U.S. Healthcare System
Singapore Latest News,Singapore Headlines
  • 📰 TheOnion
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 1 sec. here
  • 2 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 4%
  • Publisher: 51%

LONDON—Expressing surprise upon learning the high price of the commonplace procedure, local British man Roger Hiddleston was reportedly astounded Friday to hear how much it would cost to extract a mustard jar from his rectum under the United States healthcare system. “When a mate of mine mentioned that it could cost hundreds if not thousands of pounds for something as routine as getting a container of Colman’s mustard out of my sphincter, I was flabbergasted,” said Hiddleston, telling reporters that the statistic was a stark example of the prohibitively high cost of medical care in the U.S. “It’s incredible to think that I could spend a week’s pay for something that would take the doctor less than five minutes to fix. And you know this means there must be countless Americans walking around with mustard jars in their anuses, wincing in pain with every step, and they are completely unable to afford help. It’s a bloody disgrace.” Hiddleston added that with the way things were going with the NHS, he could imagine a future where even in the U.K. he could face a hefty medical bill for stuffing objects into his orifices.

We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

TheOnion /  🏆 724. in US

Singapore Latest News, Singapore Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

HHS Provides $100 Million to Help U.S. Healthcare Systems Prepare For COVID-19 PatientsHHS Provides $100 Million to Help U.S. Healthcare Systems Prepare For COVID-19 PatientsThe U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Office of the Assistant Secretary for Preparedness and Response (HHS ASPR) today announced it will provide $100 million to aid U.S. healthcare systems in preparing quickly for a surge in COVID-19 patients.
Read more »

Ford is working with 3M and GE to make respirators and ventilatorsFord is working with 3M and GE to make respirators and ventilatorsFord announced Tuesday that it's working with 3M and GE Healthcare to produce medical equipment and protective gear for healthcare workers to help address shortages in the fight against the coronavirus.
Read more »

What the $2 trillion stimulus bill means for the healthcare industry - Business InsiderWhat the $2 trillion stimulus bill means for the healthcare industry - Business InsiderThe CARES Act has numerous provisions to rescue the healthcare system, which has become flooded by the demands of treating the novel coronavirus.
Read more »

IHF: iShares U.S. Healthcare Providers ETF - Stock Price, Quote and News - CNBCIHF: iShares U.S. Healthcare Providers ETF - Stock Price, Quote and News - CNBCThe iShares Healthcare Providers ETF (IHF) is surging today, led by names like Tenet, Humana, and Universal Health Services. The ETF's largest component, UnitedHealth, is on pace for its best week since May 2009.
Read more »

What It’s Like to Self-Quarantine With a Michelin-Starred ChefWhat It’s Like to Self-Quarantine With a Michelin-Starred Chef'It’s the only source of joy, the only routine. We must eat, and we’ll make it beautiful, and I’ll feel obscene and grotesque in my luck, and also sated and okay, for a few hours.'
Read more »



Render Time: 2025-04-16 07:04:22