Somewhere, buried deep beneath the mounds of churlish humor and forced MCU awkwardness of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is a heartfelt swansong, bookending the space adventure saga. But to wrest these fleeting gems, one must sit through 2 1/2 hours of nauseating dialogue, encapsulating the worst…
Somewhere, buried deep beneath the mounds of churlish humor and forced MCU awkwardness of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is a heartfelt swansong, bookending the space adventure saga. But to wrest these fleeting gems, one must sit through 2 1/2 hours of nauseating dialogue, encapsulating the worst of what the Disney Marvel universe has to offer.
The film largely revolves around Rocket , offering glimpses into his harrowing origins. Rocket is revealed to be an early prototype of a cruel lab experiment led by a maniacal scientist known as the High Evolutionary . Bearing a grandiose God complex, the High Evolutionary seeks to spawn his own society, purged of any impurities. In pursuit of his delusions, he subjects countless animals to torment, transforming them into anthropomorphic beings.
Meanwhile, the Guardians are reading off a script written in finger paint by fourth graders. It is a constant stream of insipid lines, including such gems as, “Even my butt can make metaphors.
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