After her mother abandoned them, Zulayqha Zulkifli became the mother figure to her three siblings, juggling her studies and working to put meals on the table. She tells her story to CNA Women in this instalment of our Mother’s Day series on unconventional motherhood.
Mother’s Day holds a different meaning for Zulayqha Zulkifli. While others celebrate the day with their mothers and shower them with affection, the 29-year-old instead remembers how her own mum left the family when she was a teenager.
“It would have been easier if she had just left entirely, but she was around for a few days, then gone for the next, and we would have no idea where she went.” Emotionally, even though their father was around, Zulayqha was the main source of comfort and support for her siblings. It was always siblings first for Zulayqha, who would forgo meals if it meant her siblings would have enough to eat. She said her poor eating habits caused her to develop long-lasting gastric issues.STUDYING HARD TO BUILD A HOME FOR HER SIBLINGS
After ITE, where she studied community care and social services, she got a place in Nanyang Polytechnic to study social work in 2014. But the juggling and strain of supporting her siblings continued.Mornings were spent getting herself and her siblings ready for the day. She would study in school in the afternoons before heading to her cashier job in the evenings. After her shift ended, she would head back to the void desk to complete her homework or study and be around for her siblings.
Her efforts in working hard paid off. Zulayqha received multiple academic awards in ITE and NYP, which help fund her studies and lift the financial burden on the family.Older brother Zulhaqem also excelled in school, and the two oldest in the family would pool their bursary and scholarship money together and split it into four parts so that each sibling would get a share.
“I wanted to be there for my family. It was tiring, but what can I do? Our mother wasn’t around anymore. So if it will ease things for my father and my siblings, I will do it.” It was in 2020, during Singapore’s circuit breaker, that Zulayqha noticed how many low-income families in her neighbourhood were suffering. She and Zulhaqem started Project Hills, a ground-up initiative that provided food and essentials to them, and the entire family of five helped out with distribution efforts.
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