‘I’m 90 Days Sober — Am I Ready for a Baby Yet?’

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‘I’m 90 Days Sober — Am I Ready for a Baby Yet?’
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SoberQuestioning: 'How do you juggle the demands of a child versus 'putting your own oxygen mask on first'? Can I do what it takes to break the cycle of addiction in families?' anamariecox responds

I have been trying this for years, in and out of all the treatment centers. Never managed sobriety more than nine months. I’ll have 90 days tomorrow and I’m feeling strong. I keep coming back.

My first child was not raised sober from day one; he’s now 6 and recording memories. Now I want a second. I’ve been on sperm-donation websites for years. I’m 37, and I have to pull the trigger soon. I’m not going to tell you I think a second child in early sobriety, by choice, is a good idea.

My own experience didn’t end great, but I also didn’t go back to using. That “rule” about relationships is conventional wisdom, not a sentence. So I don’t want to tell you that becoming a single mother a second time over in early sobriety — or doing any of things we’re not “supposed” to do — will lead you to inevitable relapse. What’s more, I have an inkling of how powerful the upside would be.

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