'It's a fight I am willing to make for my children and their future.'
and how damaging they can be. Further, my husband and I have had to have the tough conversations with our extended family, some of whom can't seem to understand why this is important. We've had to tell them to avoid joking with our son, for example, about wearing the color pink or dancing or our daughter not being allowed to burp or fart freely — because"boys shouldn't do that" or"that's not OK for girls.
Since my children started school, they've come home with language that we've strictly taught against. It's disheartening, to say the least. For example, we recently, and our whole family loved it, even my son. But after just one day back to school after the holiday break, other messages had already crept into my second-grader's mind. I was cooking dinner at the stove while my daughter colored acoloring book and my son completed homework sitting next to her.
I thought about putting the conversation on hold , but I put the meal on simmer instead. I gently reminded my son that he adored that movie just yesterday. Then I asked him where he had heard thatwas only a girl movie. He said a couple of his buddies at school were joking about it during recess because their sisters loved it so much.
Children, and all humans regardless of their age, can enjoy whatever movie they want. Gender has no control over what a person likes or dislikes.And society's idea of what's right and wrong doesn't just trickle into your home from school — it comes from everywhere. The kids and I were shopping for a child's birthday party just the other day, for a little girl who loves Star Wars. After a lot of deliberation, we picked out.
Raising children without falling into gender stereotypes can feel both exhausting and defeating at times. You put all of this work into breaking those old-school"norms," then society makes you take two giant steps back. It's a fight I am willing to make for my children and their future, but it never ceases to surprise me how far we still have to go and. My hope is that the more conversations we have together as a family, the more my children will learn.
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