Raise Your Hand If You’d Date Joe From ‘You.’ You’re Not Alone

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Raise Your Hand If You’d Date Joe From ‘You.’ You’re Not Alone
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Raise Your Hand If You’d Date Joe From 'You.' You’re Not Alone.

Penn Badgley, as Joe Goldberg inThe nearly 600 responses came mostly from women. Many of them—at least a few hundred—said yes. I asked them why.

“Because he is so attentive, loving, and caring,” Kisha, a 44-year-old writer, tells me. “Joe wanted love in return, but I would be fully aware that if I did not appreciate him, I was going to end up in a cage or dead...lol,” she says.“I would definitely go out with him,” says Shymaa, a 21-year-old business student. “He’s my type…without the murdering part.” The show, she says, “fulfills my fantasies.

And many women say that Joe reminds them of men they’ve already dated, who they describe as stalkers and abusers. One woman I spoke to said of Joe, “Knowing what I know, I wouldn't even look [Joe’s] way. I wouldn't even want to associate with him for fear of not only my life but anyone I know as well.”

“I've had many men become obsessed with me in my lifetime and it's not fun,” she says. “In fact, it can turn scary real quick!” These men, she says, “go to extreme lengths” to keep other people from being close to you. “Maybe [they haven’t] killed anyone in a literal sense, but they slowly kill who you are and your other relationships,” she says.

“The writer was brilliant in making the character Joe,” she says. “They made him exhibit loyal behaviors most women—or men, for that matter—long for in a self-absorbed world. People justify Joe's wrongdoing because it’s morally intertwined with a justified feeling from their perspective.”Shymaa agrees. “The writer gave people what they wanna see in themselves,” she says. “It’s a criminal reflection of most people’s true selves...especially women.

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