The Democratic Primary Debates Two: 2 Fast, 2 Many Candidates

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The Democratic Primary Debates Two: 2 Fast, 2 Many Candidates
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Totally measured, fair, and logical snap judgments of every candidate from Tuesday night's DemDebate, by 4evrmalone

Photo: Scott Olson/Getty Images Welcome back, everyone. Doesn’t it feel like we were just here? “Here” being sitting on our respective couches, watching a bunch of Democrats sputter through two-thirds of their intended sentences before getting cut off by moderators citing time constraints? Except this time the debates are three hours instead of two. Which means ample time to really get to know candidates and what they stand for or, uh, something.

Can name: Several failed presidential candidates whose names anybody born after 1988 would have to Google.My God, who at CNN did this man bribe to get so many questions tonight? Great question.Will not: Decriminalize crossing the border.Wait … he did?: Yeah, spoke too soon. Sorry about that. [Waves hands in dramatic apology.

What was that about cable and college? She wants to make them cheaper. Which, for me, great! I watched this debate using a cable log-in I stole from my girlfriend’s dad.

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