My 4-Year-Old Was Hospitalized With COVID-19
, how parenting changes over time, and how big events shape who we are as parents. However, as the world has been taken over by COVID-19, now so has my family, and I need to write about it. I have to write about it.As a physician, I followed the outbreak of COVID-19 in China and Italy closely.
I knew walking into the hospital that we would be there for a few days — I thought three, maybe four. I knew that he would be placed on a “COVID rule out” — where they treat him as if he has it until the testing comes back negative. And, because I am familiar with hospital policies on COVID, I knew that I would not be able to leave his room until his testing was negative.
I did everything right. I was supposed to keep my family safe and I failed. And, yes, I know I didn’t. But how can those thoughts not go through your head when your little boy has the scariest virus in on the planet right now?I held him while they did the labs and IV and swabs. He was so exhausted. Courtesy of Anna Zimmermann
It has now been over five days since arriving at the hospital. Lincoln is starting to feel a little better. Little glimpses of my happy son are peeking out for 30 minutes at a time. He is sleeping 16+ hours a day and for the first time today, he finally ate something . I can’t even bribe him to eat chocolate pudding or chocolate milk or chocolate ice cream — and this is my kid who asks me first thing in the morning, “Mama, are you hiding chocolate from me?” nearly every morning.cough ever.
Being in the hospital has been completely isolating. I am not allowed to leave his room. No one is allowed to come into his room. The nurses and physicians come in to assess him wearing all their personal protective equipment , but they minimize the number of times they come into the room to preserve gear. My husband is at home with my girls. We can’t hug each other. I can’t hug my girls. My family is split up and we feel so far away.
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