Your child is constantly lashing out — and your help is what's needed. Learn how to use understanding and compassion to reduce misbehavior.
, “Use your words”? Often children don’t know what words to use. Overtime, reflective listening teaches children a rich and varied vocabulary for expressing their emotions. The following steps will help you incorporate reflective listening into your parenting strategy.Put Your Own Emotions On Hold, we often get upset. We find ourselves getting angry when our child behaves defiantly, or feeling anxious or guilty because we wish they weren't feeling so bad.
Before you do or say something, calm yourself down. Here's a tool that has helped a lot of parents accomplish that: Visualize yourself scooping up your anger, worry, or disappointment with both hands and place that uncomfortable emotion at the side of the room. Picturing yourself doing it can clear your mind. Your feeling will still be there, waiting for you, if you want it back later.
Stop what you're doing, look at your child, and listen. Sometimes our children are open with us about their feelings, and it's easy to listen. But it's also easy to get distracted. We need to look at our children to show that we are listening. It helps to make listening noises, words, and phrases, such as,"Hmmm,""Oh,""Really,""Goodness.
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