When You’re Undocumented, “Going Home” Is Complicated, Dangerous, or Even Impossible

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When You’re Undocumented, “Going Home” Is Complicated, Dangerous, or Even Impossible
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'Leaving U.S. borders means you may never be able to return, forcing people to risk their lives on dangerous treks to make it back to their loved ones in the States.'

, a travel document that lawfully allows certain immigrants to safely travel outside of the U.S. and return.Our grief stretches across land and sea, with invisible barriers keeping us in while keeping us out.I was filled with anticipation. When I landed in Mexico, I thought I’d feel complete, like a yearslong void would finally be filled. But, to my surprise, I didn’t get the magical feeling I was expecting that would tell me I was home.

There were some existential worries, too. I pondered if I would belong and feel welcomed. If I didn’t, I feared what that would say about me and my identity. I was so excited but also nervous. Although I had already traveled on Advance Parole before, this time I’d be going home. It felt different. My luggage was filled with gifts for family members that my mom and I had shopped for before my trip. But I also got to witness how much easier it is for folks who are not from my country to travel there. I had a layover in Texas, and the plane was filled with non-Latine white people who were headed to Guatemala.

Since that initial trip, I’ve adjusted my status, and I’ve been able to visit again. Like the first time, there was a bit of a cultural shock, but I was able to be with other family members I didn’t see the first time.

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