'I don’t want to say I was dead inside, but I'd honestly rather read or sleep or watch a true crime documentary than have sex.'
, but I'd never expected it in my case. I actually still liked my partner and found him super attractive. We had often joked about my “dirty 30s” because things had remained quite frequent and fun in that department, but now that I was in my 40s, everything had shifted, and not in a good way., like most moms — but there was just a profound indifference, a kind of void of feeling about the whole thing, a big “meh...” when it came to sex.
I don’t want to say I was dead inside, but I'd honestly rather read or sleep or watch a true crime documentary than have sex. It had absolutely nothing to do with him. It wasIt was like something had turned off a switch down there. It also probably didn't help that he was trying so hard. And I was feeling so anxious about trying to get up my lady boner.
There was this one night when I came home where he'd gone all out. The entire apartment was aglow with candles and everywhere you looked were roses. He'd managed to get childcare and he'd even cooked. He’s more of a griller but does OK when he follows a recipe exactly to the letter. He stood there, so hopeful, with flutes of champagne, beaming with pride and all I could think of... was the 1977 song— except in my head, I'd rewritten the lyrics as, “I WANT ME to want YOU...
I had to figure something out. I emailed my OB/GYN, but she said this was just part of menopause and that I might need to get creative in other ways or seek the help of a sex therapist.columns and it just seemed like the issue was more physiological than psychological. I started doing some research. It turns out there are all kinds of lubes with hot cinnamon and rose oil that sounded positively painful and like a UTI in a bottle, but that's when I stumbled on an article last year aboutarticles about a sildenafil-based cream that's essentially the same ingredient used in Viagra for men, but when used as a topical cream for women causes far fewer side effects and well...
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