Self-care is 'about removing yourself from conversations that are hurting you—even the ones you feel most obligated to be a part of' (JaeFiasco)
When I see a full name in hashtag form, my heart stops for a moment. The more I see it, the more wary I get. Context clues fill me in and I start to put the pieces together during my morning scroll. Sandra Bland. Philando Castile. Eric and later, Erica Garner. Trayvon Martin. The last one gets especially sticky since, for the last five years, there are always tweets and Instagram posts to commemorate what would have been his birthday. This year, he would have been 23 years old.
The internet is full of stories about violence and racism against Black people It lies in realities of gendered violence that manifest in more harmful ways for Black women, with reported incidents sitting at a rate 35-percent higher than white women. The conversations around wage disparity are, for us, complicated by the fact that we are affected by the widening pay gaps between men and women and the ones between races.
And honestly, even good news stories can cause pain While there exists plenty of light between these cracks, they’re still not without their own nuance. It’s of course remarkable that Ava DuVernay is the first Black woman to direct a $100 million film, but you also have to think about why, in 2018, we’re still in an age of firsts.
For many of us, it can start to feel as though trauma is our only valuable export, even with all of the freedom that online spaces give us. So while these are important things that I’m never going to stop talking about, I’ve found it imperative to step back and disconnect in ways that other people don’t have to. They can, but the stakes are always different.
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